Should I cool it or should I blow?

A couple of weeks ago, when things were getting very much out of control, I told the boss (not Big Boss, just the intermediary) that things weren’t going too well, and if I hadn’t managed to get things into better balance by the end of the month I was going to resign. That was accepted, and things started improving as a result of my reprioritisationing, which partly consisted of compartmentalising my life: no thinking of Home when at work, and no thinking of Work when at home. Then this week I’ve been off poorly, as you know, so I phoned in on Monday to explain that I was going to see another doctor, certainly wouldn’t be in that day, probably not Tuesday either but would aim for Friday (those being the only days I work there). That was fine. I phoned in again on Tuesday morning, saying that the New Doctor had thought it unlikely I’d be fit before next week, but that I was still hoping to get in on Friday anyway.

“Oh dear, I’d hoped you would be in today. I’m off on Friday, and on holiday all next week, and then it’s the time you said you’d make your decision. I wanted to talk to you today to find out what you thought the decision was going to be.”

Well I’m sorry, but I think a hurried decision due to pressure like that is as likely to be wrong as right, so I’m sticking to my guns. If I could see into the future and knew how things would be going in a fortnight’s time there’d be no problem. But I can’t, I don’t, and so I won’t be rushed. But I feel all stressed again, because I’m at Home, thinking about work, which is what the problem was in the first place.